Partners in Parenting 1/4/16

Partners in Parenting

“Motivation!”

Motivation is a funny thing!  I hear parents share stories sometimes about their child’s “lack of motivation.”  Motivation can indeed be a good thing.  Motivation can be a result of a need or a desired outcome.  A person can be motivated to exercise by the:

• Need that the doctor shared to be more healthy or
• The desired outcome of feeling better as you live life.

I was motivated last summer to start running once…I was stung by a bee after upsetting its nest while doing some yard work, and I had the need to run from the whole swarm of bees for the desired outcome of getting away from pain!  Yes, pain can motivate!  Physical pain, emotional pain, social pain, etc. can all motivate people’s actions.

Here’s the real thing to consider.  Why does pain or negativity have to be what motivates us so often? 

Think about it.  Can you imagine telling a child, “Eat all your vegetables because they will make you healthy and strong,” and then find them gobbling up all the vegetables on their plate immediately?  Would that happen at your house?  Or would a better motivational scenario in your house be like this:  “Eat all your vegetables or you’ll have no dessert and no screen time tonight.”  I know what motivates my kids, and I bet you know what motivates yours.  In the end, it is probably most often the same thing that motivates us as adults – avoiding some kind of pain.

What does God have to say about motivation, though?  God asks us to love as he has loved us.  I’m really intrigued by helping myself and my kids be motivated by love instead of pain.  I don’t think it will be easy, but it will be beneficial!!

“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”  John 15:12

Family Discussion Points!

Talk about motivation for doing homework or going to work.  What motivates you to do those things?

Is pain avoidance a primary motivator in life?  Why?

If your family was motivated by love instead of pain avoidance, how would everyday events look different in your home?  Talk about waking up, homework, supper, chores, etc.