Partners in Parenting

“Who Did It?”

• Mud on the kitchen floor someone tracked into the house
• The rug by the shower door is soaked from someone who got out without drying off
• The refrigerator door was left open all day by just a crack
• A basketball was left outside overnight
• The lights in the basement were left on
• My tools in the garage were used and not put away

Here’s a short list of things that might happen in any home as parents wonder “who did it” while raising their kids.  Parents, don’t want to jump to conclusions about who is guilty, but the older a child gets, the easier it is to know if he/she are the ones “who did it” without even having to ask.

Well, here is a question for your family to discuss, then seek the answer in scripture:  Who raised Jesus from the dead?  Was it Jesus himself?  Angels?  God?  The Holy Spirit?  Hmm.  Who actually did it?? 

Just like at home when you aren’t sure who did something, you have to do some investigating.  The place to investigate this is in the Bible.  The ONE and ONLY source of absolute truth that we have in the world today!

Family Discussion Points!

Let everyone in the family share who they think raised Jesus from the dead.  Let it be a discussion.  Ask why people think what they think.

Then, get out your Bible and look up Acts 2:32 and Acts 4:10 to find the answer!!

Partners in Parenting

“Sleep Deprivation!”

I had the opportunity to travel to Florida with my family over Spring Break this year.  We left after school on Friday and drove straight through until late afternoon on Saturday.  After our vacation, we left Florida at 10:30pm Friday and drove straight through until Saturday afternoon.  We had two trips.  Both involved driving for 18+ hours in a row with occasional stops for food and gasoline.  I had two very different experiences. 

On the drive down to Florida, I was fine until about 3:30am.  Jen drove until about 6:30am while I slept.  We stopped for breakfast, and I just never felt very good.  I thought I was “walking in a cloud” the whole time.  I drove a bit more, but I couldn’t make it.  I was just too tired to function behind the wheel.  Jen drove again.  Eventually, I had enough sleep and was able to drive the rest of the way.

On the drive back home, I only slept one hour while Jen drove.  I drove the rest of the way without any sleepiness or problems.

Why so different?????  Well, I really think that I began the trip to Florida tired from all the planning, packing, etc. to get ready to go on vacation.  On the way home, I was coming off six good days of rest and relaxation (I honestly don’t recall ever sleeping in so late in my entire life as on this vacation).  I was rested for the return trip.

Sleep deprivation is a serious problem.  It can do things to people…change them…conquer them…destroy them…magnify their weaknesses…break them down!  Yes, sleep deprivation is serious.  Consider the disciples in the garden who were Jesus’ closest disciples (Peter, James, and John).  They were chosen to support Jesus in his deepest hour of need for prayer, and they fell asleep.  He woke them up, but three times they fell asleep.  Jesus loved them, but their sleep deprivation conquered them.  “When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy.”  Matthew 26:43  I don’t think any of them WANTED to abandon Jesus, but they did.  Adequate sleep is good for people.  That’s probably why God used the 7^th day of creation to rest – to show us our need for it!

Family Discussion Points!

Talk about what happens to people in your family when they don’t get enough sleep (anyone get crabby??).

Besides sleep, have each person name another thing they don’t want to be deprived of having (TV, food, water, faith).  Why did you answer like you did?

Do you need to change your bedtime to be sure you are getting enough rest?  Do you need to find time to “rest” from the busyness of life to rest in the presence of God and His Word?

Partners in Parenting

“Identifying the Source!”

This morning, I woke up hearing two “chirps” that sounded distant and muffled, but I could clearly hear them.  I began to investigate the one that I was pretty sure I knew.  I let the dog out, stood in the doorway for five seconds, and, “Yep, I nailed that one! It is a robin waking up the neighborhood.”  It only sounded muffled because I was inside the house.

Now for the other sound…  It was a faint chirp that sounded like a smoke alarm battery going dead, or an appliance alarm, or a cell phone going dead, or a malfunction of some kind of electrical item?????  It chirped about every 30 seconds.  I walked all over the house listening for the source of the chirp, but I couldn’t find it.  I stood by every smoke detector and listened, but the chirp would come from another location.  I just couldn’t nail down the exact location (and I’d been at it for over 10 minutes).  I had some papers to file down in the basement so I went down to the file cabinet.  There it was…but louder than before.  Hah, I was going to solve the mystery.  Well, I finally did.  It was the carbon monoxide detector that I keep in the furnace room.  The batteries were going dead, and that was my notification.  I finally identified the source, but it took quite some time.

This whole situation reminded me of how easy and hard it can be to identify sin.  I had no problem recognizing the chirp of a bird which was outside, but I had trouble recognizing the chirp of the alarm that was inside.  Kind of like how I can sometimes find the sin in others much more easily than I can find the sin in myself.  Seeing other people’s faults and sins is like identifying the robin this morning (easy), but seeing my own faults is like identifying the source of the chirp inside the house (difficult).  During Lent, we are to focus on our sinfulness, not others sinfulness, in expectation of the forgiveness that each of us freely receives each day.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”  Matthew 7:3

Family Discussion Points!

Whistle a song or make a sound, and play a game trying to identify the song or sound!

Why do we tend to see other people’s sin instead of our own?

Can each family member mention a sin they struggle with?  (not obeying right away, talking too much, not showing love and care for others, dishonesty, etc.) --- that’s HARD!

Partners in Parenting

“Blood All Over!”

On one of those extremely cold nights this past winter, our dog, Zeke, went outside into the sub-zero temperatures of the night.  He quickly came back into the house and its warmth.  As my wife walked through the kitchen, she quickly realized that for some strange reason there was blood all over the floor.  She soon realized that Zeke had somehow snapped a toenail in half.  I don’t know for sure, but I think it probably got rather brittle in the 20 degree below zero weather and snapped off when he hit it on the deck or something similar.  Dogs have something in their toenails called the “quick.”  It is basically a blood-filled canal that comes near the tip of the toenail.  When it gets cut, it can bleed pretty profusely.  We got the blood stopped eventually, but he couldn’t walk on that leg outside for almost 3 weeks. 

Having blood all over our house due to this event reminded me of the Passover as the 10^th Plague before Pharaoh let the Israelites leave Egypt with Moses.  It also reminds me as we near Good Friday and Easter that Jesus was our once-and-for-all Passover Lamb.  His death and resurrection assures those who have faith in Him that God will forgive all our sins.  It is through Jesus’ “blood all over” that cross on Calvary that we have been given the gift of righteousness and eternal life.  Blood all over can be a very scary thing for us (like in our house), but as Jesus’ death proves, it can also be a very good thing for us (like on the cross)!

“While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!”  Romans 5:8b, 9

Family Discussion Points!

When is the last time you saw your own blood?  Was there a lot of blood or just a little?

Blood gives life to our entire body while we are alive.  Talk about how Jesus’ blood gives life to our entire being so we can live in heaven eternally.  (forgiveness of all sins)

Partners in Parenting

Being Wanted!

Most people would probably admit that they like being wanted by another person.  Being wanted means that you play a significant part in the other person’s life.  Isn’t it great to have a friend want to spend time with you?  Isn’t it a great feeling to be asked out on a date – by your spouse?  Isn’t it an awesome feeling to have your child, say to you, “I’m struggling with something, and I want your advice?”  We live as relational people desiring to be bonded with others through the mutual desiring of each other’s affection.  Being wanted by another is generally a very good thing.

However, outlaws are sometimes placed on “Wanted” lists with the police, FBI, or other law enforcement agencies.  That kind of being “Wanted” is not a good thing.  I thought I was coming to school for a regular day of school here at Trinity last week, but when I got here, I discovered that myself and two teachers were on “Wanted” posters throughout the school.  Uh Oh, what had I done?  Well, you’ll have to read the poster to find out my crime (see below).

Parenting can become a blessing of being wanted as well as a curse of being wanted.  Being wanted by my kids for A:  bedtime prayers, hugs, band aids, holding, help with problems, and general provision of food, shelter, and clothing, is something I cherish.  Being wanted by my kids for B:  spending money, a ride here or there, fixing a broken toy, the “whooping boy” of overreacting, and the general barrage of whining, complaining, and unwarranted disgruntledness is something I loathe.

Notice the difference between A and B.  As parents, kids want us to be there for them for both.  The part I find difficult is to find satisfaction in parenting with responses like the list B.  Read the two lists again.  Both lists communicate the same thing in very different ways.  They communicate – I want you in my life.  Help!

Parents need to help their children learn that love is a constant.  Love just may look as different as list A and B above.  Parents are most wanted for their love.

“[Love] always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.” I Corinthians 13:7,8a

Family Discussion Points!

When are the times that kids most want their parents around to show them love?

Parents, is discipline a form of love? Why did you answer the way you did?

Talk about the pressures of being wanted in too many directions by too many people in too short a time frame.  What does that do to a person?